Recently, Hope “requested” (AKA: demanded) that she would like to replace her 2000 Chrysler 300m for a new used Honda Odyssey. Inspired by the desire to seize the opportunity to make my wife happy (she will kill me if I don’t buy it), this past week I embarked on the dark harrowing journey of used car shopping. Along this journey I have had the many wonderful opportunities to meet with the devil himself disguised as a used car salesman.
From the moment I walk through the doors of the dealerships and receive the warm greetings, I can already feel them sucking the dollar bills out of my wallet. My fear of the salesmen getting the upper hand has transformed me from a nice Kollel Rabbi into a ruthless bargainer (perhaps a little bit of an exaggeration). Unfortunately, in the last 72 hours, I have blown two really good deals and allowed them to slip away because I believed I could get a better price elsewhere. Hope insists that my greed and strong desire to prevail over the salesmen have gotten the better of me (and she will not be happy next week when we drive to New Jersey in the Chrysler). I prefer the comforting words of my close friends that it is “beshert,” it was obviously not meant to be, rather than accepting the possibility that I am being too greedy. G-d did not want me to be the proud owner of those cars (which happened to be exactly what we were looking for).
Our different perspectives on my lost opportunities remind me of a question I have on this weeks Torah portion (Vayigash). In this weeks Torah portion Joseph reveals himself to his brothers and informs them that he is the Viceroy of Egypt, and the brother that they sold into slavery 22 years ago. One can only imagine the embarrassment and shame the brothers experienced when they were standing once again face to face with Joseph. Immediately following his revelation to his brothers Joseph offered the following message to them: “And now, be not distressed, nor reproach yourselves for having sold me here, for it was to be a provider that G-d sent me ahead of you.”
My greed in my experience trying to buy a used car, and the brothers’ jealousy, led us both to make bad decisions. Can there still be an element of “beshert?” What was Joseph telling his brothers? Was he telling them that they were not liable for inappropriately selling him into slavery, since it enabled him to be in the position to save his family? If this is not the message of Joseph then what is the message? Is he simply trying to make them not feel bad for selling him into slavery, or is there something deeper going on? Please share with me your thoughts on this verse.
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